The River

Work has been a little stressful lately. The winds of change are starting to blow, and I am not sure where we'll end up when the winds die down. The uncertainty is a little unnerving. I am not one to lose sleep, but the last few nights were miserable as I tossed and turned, thinking about my fluid future and dreaming of worst-case scenarios. Life will throw us plenty of curve balls, and I guess the trick is learning how to hit em.

I have a few tricks up my sleeve when it comes to facing the hard times. So far, these methods haven't failed me. First, I believe in prayer. I believe that I have a loving Father in Heaven that not only cares about me, but wants me to be happy. He knows me and knows what is best for me. By communicating with Him, I can receive direction and comfort. 

Temple attendance is another trick I employ when I have a particular stress or worry in my life.

The Temple has a way of refocusing me, and letting me know that life is full of wonderful things, but the most important things are my family, honoring the Priesthood that I hold, obedience, and my relationship with my Savior. The temporal things in life are temporary, while the spiritual things in life are eternal. This perspective has always been a huge stress relief. Why spend time worrying about things that are temporary? "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." 

Lastly, fly fishing has a way of completely refocusing my mind.

I have the tendency to perseverate. If it's work, play, football, music, or a new toy or hobby, my mind can be completely fixated where I think of little else. It's almost like mental paralysis. A day on the river can somehow channel that energy into fishing. And when the fishing is done, my mind is wonderfully clear. I am so lucky that my wife knows and understands me. 

Yesterday she sent me out the door, and I was at the river by noon. I planned on fishing until dark. The drive to the river is a little over an hour, and usually I am filled with anticipation for the fishing ahead, but yesterday, I was more worried about work. I got to the river and rigged up, and all of the stress took a back seat when I saw a big ol' fish come up and chomp on a fly. Then I saw him again. And again. And again. I tied on a size 20 Caddidge and served it up a few feet in front of him. As it drifted closer, I saw him come up and take a good, hard look at my fly, and then go back down. Not to be deterred, I tried again, but with the same result: he came, he looked, and he snubbed. I decided to try one more time. Like any good salesman, I thought to myself, "no" doesn't mean "no," it really means "not right now." So I cast to him one more time. The drift was perfect, the fly lazily meandering with the slow current. I waited. I watched. My breath shallow, my eyes fixed on that tiny fly, I saw my fish approach. This time was different; his actions swift, he aggressively devoured my fly like it would be his last. He started to go back down, still not realizing his mistake, until I set the hook! The fight was on! He angrily jumped, darted, dove, and hid. He violently shook his head, trying to free himself from the hook that held him captive. But it was no use. Soon, his energy spent, he came towards me like a disobedient child, eyes full of regret.

I think we can all identify with this little fish. How many times have I pursued something that turned out to be detrimental? I have been fooled more times than I care to admit. With the hook now out of his mouth, I hold him in the water a little longer and admire his beauty. He's large, and is probably a well respected fish in his community. I think he must be embarrassed, and is probably thinking to himself, "How could I be so dumb?" We look at each other for a few more seconds, and then I gently release him. He swims away, probably cursing me and thanking me under his breath.

Back at the truck,  I kneel and thank my Heavenly Father for a wonderful day enjoying his creations. I also repent for using a choice word or two after falling in the river, only a few minutes earlier. 

Headed home, I realized that it didn't make sense to worry about work any more. I don't worry about getting struck by lightning, hit by a bus, a cardiac arrest, or any other calamity that could possibly befall me. Those things are out of my control, just like my current work situation. 

"Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your Heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they?" 

Last night I slept like a baby.